hmmm

hasnt kicked in






but nothing kicks in till the day of for me
and it doesnt effect me once its gone



sometimes it bothers me that im not a normal person
like some people are like "yay im leaving" or "im scared"
and im just like w.e

maybe its because im use to never being home
so its not effecting me yet


but i know when my parents leave it going to be like im a kindergartener, leaving my parents for the first time
and im ready for this adventure

im ready to be one my own
i mean, its not like ill be gone for a year, that might be kind of hard my first year
but i mean, i can still come home on long weekends









but to me, going to college is going to be sooooo much eaiser than starting highschool, because i will know people going to edinboro
one of which im goo friends with
this is something i didnt have in highschool

and now i have a defined style that i can impose on people
and im more confident





i still dont want to go to college
i never did
and im going to hate it the whole way through
but i there are times you are forced to follow societies rules
and thats what im doing
im living the life that i never wanted to live
and always thought was stupid






since i told someone thing, i guess i should just inform everyone
my wish is almost always
"i wish that i could find someone that will fully accept me for who i am, and change me into who i want to be with out me noticing"

thats all i really want in this world
and once i am the person i want to be
then i will be content and happy


or atleas i hope i will
despite the face i wont
because im never fully happy with anything all the time