@ 7:13 i was happy

and for quite some time after
thanks to sceneXster
haha
hes the shitttttt
xDDDD

umm, but yea
then i faded back into me
were thoughts of pain dance in my head
instead of sugar plums..

my back hurts

"as the pain rains down, so shall the blood.
drip after drip, drown in my river.
drip by drip until im gone"

back hurts
im kinda cold
mt tummys growling
i dnt wanna move
i fell like crying for no real reason
i fell like im bout to barf

tomorrow i gotta take my cuzin and her friend dwn twn
because they came up to see pittsburgh
what a wonderful experience

being trapped in this hell
i mean house
with 3 ft of snow
and then having that stupid
"dnt take showers, do laundry, or flush toilets because we are conserving water"
bull shit
we lost power a few times
but only for a few mins
and i've been out of the picture for all the time but an hr or so
i still havent done ne homework
my life is a wreck
uggg
i really need to stop complaining
and i have so much more shit on my mind
=\
i think it will be better off inside

by the way
im sick of your shit
im sick of our fucking retarded little arguments
i hate how u criticize me
i hate when u make me cry
i hate when u go on about shit i dnt care about
i hate when u can tell that something is wrong
i hate that you care
i hate that u talk
i hate that u breath
i hate what you did to me
i just fucking hate every aspect of u

ur a slut
ur a whore
ur a liar
ur a cheater
ur a user
ur an abuser
ur a rapist
ur a stealer
ur a murder
ur everything bad

blah, i fucking hate people in this world
and almost every last one of them
please do me a favor, and all go burn in hell
wait, i take that back
because thats where ill be
chilling and being me
with u all some place else
so leave me now
leave me the fuck alone
ill talk if i want
dnt force it out
ill do what i want
because its my fucking life

maybe ill smoke
maybe ill drink
maybe ill do every fucking drug i see
maybe ill sell my self
and ill be ur bitch
but dnt tell me im wrong
or ill fucking flip
ill slit ur throat
if u tell me who the fuck i should be
maybe ill be a murder
maybe ill change to a saint
maybe ill just fall off the face of the earth

because fuck you
and fuck ur logic
i'm not buying into ur shit
maybe i dont believe in god
maybe i think the worlds flat
maybe i think the Holocaust was a fake
maybe i think everything i learned was a lie

all i want is for u to let me be me
dnt ridicule
and dnt judge me
i am who i am
and i like what i like
maybe i am right, and u are wrong
maybe the hardliners will die and rot in their hell
while the stone rs and loners will sing in their heaven

maybe what you learned was wrong
maybe what you teaching is a joke
and that book is all lies
maybe everything thing any one knows is wrong
maybe its wrong to breath
and eat
and sleep and live

maybe every thing is a fucking conspiracy
and frankly, id bet my life that every last fucking one of u is wrong

maybe suicide is right
maybe murder is good
maybe getting a disease is a sin
and youll go to hell

maybe the the people with cancer, stds, and diabetes are evil
and spawns from the devil

who knows
and who the fuck is there to say im wrong?

its sure as fucking hell not you!

so maybe we should all go
and slit our wrists and throats
and let the suckers lead their lies untill they find a 'peaceful' end

jail is a fucking joke
that just had to be said

i mean what the fuck does it do?
nothing
so fuck the police
they dnt know shit
they are taught all the wrong things
and follow everything bad

only a few people make me smile
and it seems like they always fade the fastest...

good things never stay
and 50 bad things are there to take their place

so ill say this line
to the 'god' if their really is one
fuck you
i fucking hate you
and i hope i never fucking see an asshole like you

that should ensure im going to hell
i say that too often to not..

because theres no way 'heaven' can b perfect if something as horrid as this 'god' figure is there...