Im rusted from the rain

math
ugg
i was supposed to go to a matene today
and im supposed to be there at 9
but my lady got in a car accident =\
[shes okay tho, according to someone at the theater]
but she never e-mailed my school
so im still here
and i sld of been gone
x_x

my stomach hurts
x_x and it feels like its goning to bust open

i have drama today
till 6pm
ugggg
and i forgot my charger
because i thought i wldnt b here
using my lap top
bah

i've been in an apathetic mood lately
just no real emotion at all
i havent been able to feel anything but rage

its not that fun
but i rather feel something, than nothing at all
"i rather feel pain than nothing at all"
i guess anger could qualify as pain
but most every emotion can be concidered pain in my world...

ugggg
wen i go home i gotta do soooo much shit
not sleep being one of them
clean my room
do that dishes
vaccume
and clean the litter boxes
and vaccume the house
x_x
haha, you can tell i want something

but imma start doing chores more often
why?
because i wanna go to warped tour
and concerts
and hang out with friends
and be able to get money and stuff from my parents
because doing all that crap seems to be the only way i can gain their approval ne more

internship was boring
then i went with with sound ppl
and didnt leave till almost 30mins after i was supposed to
i was almost and hr late for drama

speaking of which
im about to drop it
cuz last year i said i wldnt do it
i just hate too many ppl there
thats the problem
and im not doing no damn monkey
mainly because i cnt
because i ruined my throat by screaming
which i cant do ne more
not like i was any good
but still
i was self teaching myself

so im sitting here eating war heads, fizzys, wax bottles, and candy cigarettes
the best damn candies ever!
and i refuse to eat real food
because every time i do, i feel sick
so this is my new solution
uggg, im gonna die x_x

song of the day::
rusted from the rain by Billy Talent<3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1v_nZEljINg

one of the most amazing bands if i do say so
i honestly dont think they have one bad song

bah
i reallt dnt feel like tlkin to ne body
but i keep getting txts and calls
so they went away
and im not plannin on starting ne of them
not even to tell someone that i blogged
like i always do

idk

uggg
leaving drama i was pissed, of course
i dnt even kno y
i just got pissed
and flipped on ppl
and ran dwn the stairs to get the fuck outta the school
like always
i walk differently wen im mad
idk if u can see it
but i can feel it
it feels like im trying to be all relaxed and cool
but have the appearance if u cross me ill cut u
idk, but it feels retarded
yet powerful

im prob gonna procrastinate my hw
and cut my hair
cuz its pissing me off

i might just chop most of it off cuz its too much work x_x
and im not gonna fringe it, because then its harder to take care of..

i tld someone i was gonna cut it
and they asked for a baggie of my hair
it made me laugh
and i said okay
but im pretty sure he was kidding

but that reminded me of something my friend did
that i find, astonishing
and thats an undermining word for it
he made his best friend a necklace
and it had a vial on it
and in it was his blood
and idk, maybe thats creepy to you
but i think its cool :)
and i like to know that there are people out there like that
it makes me feel like im not alone

i mean, yea
i have friends and wat not
and we have things in common
but i dnt think i have ne one that "weird"
idk

and im going to go deaf soon
because i ALWAYS BLAST THE FUCK out of my music
and im surprised havent blown out my head phones yet
haha
skull candy are beast!!!!
<3

i feel on ice the other day
now it looks like i got beat
but oddly doesnt hurt
but the roof of my mouth is
from eating a bunch or warheads
haha

if i listed everything that hurt
id bore u to death
just like if i listed everything on my body that cracks x_x
or everything i hate
or every band i like
or next to anything
like this whole thing

which idk y people waste their lives reading this
if ur one on them
comment this
and tell me y

ugggg fuck piss shit cock

i dnt want my music to stop
because i love it
and it gives me power
idk wat kind of power
but i like it
and wen it stops
my ears ring

uggg, i wanna wash my makeup off so i can rub my eyes

today i found out that...
nvm

the music video for rusted in the raid is beast to
i wanna ride that thing
xD

but there is something about recycled things like that i really dig
like, fuck recycling paper and glass and shit
so they can melt it or w/e then re-build it
then sell it for more like the fuck heads they are
using junk, to make something
it just awesome
kinda like my person idea

you hung me
like a picture
now im just a frame

i use to be your lapdog
more im just a slave

crush me like a flower

beat me with you chains

gawd, i love this song

and this id probably annoyingly long
my bad

haha, well nvm
idc

i think imma cut my hair
read columbine
then try to finish nikki sixxs book
and then more columbine
then shower
then bed
then tomorrow
then bitch bitch bitch
INTERNSHIP!!!
and im supposed to b with the sound guy like all day
or so i was told..

which reminds me
i need to update the blog
ugg fuck
x_x

i guess ill do that now
and then move on with the books and wat not

lets see who txts
and calls
or reads this

oh yea!
here r quotes i like
because i need to delete some of my post its on jangels...
We are the people our parents warned us about.
- Jimmy Buffett
Perhaps I know whay it is man alone who laughs: He alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter
~Friedrich Nietzche
Anarchy is the only slight glimmer of hope.
Mick Jagger
Tyranny and anarchy are never far apart.
-Jeremy Bentham
Our government... teaches the whole people by its example. If the government becomes the lawbreaker, it breeds contempt for law; it invites every man to become a law unto himself; it invites anarchy.
-Louis D. Brandeis
When the government fears the people, there is liberty. When the people fear the government, there is tyranny
-?
The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants
-?
Thus always to tyrants
-John Wilkes Booth& i guess you could say Timothy McVeigh
a liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a argument
-Robert Frost

but i have a new goal
for my life
i want to have a wikipedia article
when i die
or before
because...
nvm
im turning into them

not sure if thats good or bad
turning into ones of great interest
oh fuck it
you all know who im talking about it
and if ur dnt u really dnt kno me

idk
i guess ill just stop here
before i get all emotional like

and fuck
those people have been on my mind
for most of the day

but part of me likes it
the old me is bac

oh shit, thats bad
kinda

uggg, leaving for rizzle now...